After months of waiting, we have some HUGE news to share. Our little party of 3 is becoming a party of 5! (I have so many Matthew Fox jokes to insert here since he is my husband’s man crush, but I will stay on task.) We have been matched with TWO (yes, TWO) precious little girls who we adore. The details of how and when and why are private for now, but here is what I will say: God’s plans are better than our plans, and we are so grateful to have been chosen to parent these precious souls.
Things are about to get crazy in the Fields house! Our 7-year-old son will be a big brother times two, and we will move from parents of an only child (a fairly self-sufficient one at that!) to parents of THREE kids of different ages with varying degrees of need and diverse interests and unique personalities. On top of that, we are transitioning from an adoptive family to a transracial adoptive family. This is both humbling and overwhelming as we think about navigating this world and raising our children in the cultural context in which we live. We feel painfully ill-equipped, and we are reaching out, in and around for support, guidance and feedback. My perspective on adoption has evolved significantly throughout this process, and I hope to share more of that in the coming months. But one thing that hasn’t changed is my deep gratitude to our family and friends and various communities for embracing our family and loving our children. (Even before meeting them!)
Prior to our own experience with adoption 3 years ago, I must admit, I was pretty naïve about many things. Our learning curve felt very steep, and many of our closest people learned right along with us. There are tons of amazing resources available to facilitate deeper understanding about the adoption triad (birth parents-adoptee-adoptive parents), as well as specific areas of adoption, like international adoption, transracial adoption, adoption through the foster care system, single-parent and LGBT adoption, legal issues related to the adoption process, and services available for the various stakeholders involved in adoption. My hope in the coming year is to devote more space on this blog to facilitate discussions, answer questions and invite other voices to share experiences related to adoption.
Surprisingly, despite a positive shift in perceptions of adoption, the number of adoptions in this country has remained about the same for the last 50 years. The reasons for this are not simple, and I don’t believe that adoption is something everyone should do, but if adoption is something you are thinking about or want to understand more deeply, I hope this blog can link you to the resources, information and support you will need. In my experience, the most poignant education I have received about adoption and adoptive parenting has come from the lived experiences of others. So this is mine. Ours.
The girls (the most common reference in our household for our new family members) are not with us permanently yet, but they are very much in our lives and hearts more and more every day. In the meantime, my family humbly asks for your prayers and positive thoughts as we transition to becoming a family of 5! It will be a huge change for all involved, but a change that we welcome and anticipate with excitement and hope. Thank you for your care for my family. It means the world!
Here we go…